You Will Not Win Sciatica! I Will Survive!

I’ve had a hard time with this getting old business.

More so than most of my friends, family and class mates that are the same age as I. I hear them calling themselves “old man” and “old lady” and it’s like nails on a chalkboard to me because I think, “How can you say that? You’re my age and I’m not old!” I see their kids post pictures of them and thank God that they still have their mom and dad and I think to myself again, “Well of course you still have them, they’re young! They’re my age! They’re nowhere near the age where you need to be thanking God that you are happy to still have these feeble, old people in your life because they’re still young! Geez Louise!” Then I realize I used the term “Geez Louise”…and realize why those kids probably think of someone my age as old!

But yeah, that really irks me because I am having a hard time with thinking of myself as old. Actually my mind is having a hard time, my body has thrown in the towel!

My dread old enemy Sciatica has reared its ugly-ass head again! Oh how I hate Sciatica! There is nothing I hate more! There is nothing that can turn me into a quivering ball of painful nerves more quickly than Sciatica. My last episode was in January of 2013.

I’d been doing so well, I thought it was behind me! I’ve lost weight, almost 30 pounds. I am eating healthier, I am exercising daily. A few weeks ago I spent two days doing massive amounts of yard work. Pulling weeds, bending over and wrestling them out of the ground, lifting big loads of them into the trashcan, mowing the yard, trimming the hedges, edging the grass and other than a few muscles aches I was great, I thought Sciatica was behind me, never to be seen again! But that is not the case.

Friday, March 11 while doing my morning exercise (15 minute, 1 mile Leslie Sansone walking video) at work during a break, I felt a small twinge in my back on the left side which bothered me the rest of the day. But I powered through and did another mile at lunchtime and another at my afternoon break. By Saturday morning I was still feeling discomfort, but only when I would get up out of a chair and when I would sit back down. I would make those noises that old people make, involuntarily! But still I powered through. I was like this for the rest of the weekend and the week that followed so I gave myself the week to get better since I could feel the discomfort radiating from my back to my left buttock and then down my leg to my knee and I knew it was Sciatica, but a very mild case of Sciatica.

By the next Friday, March 18th I was finally feeling better, not making those noises, well at least I was able to hold them back. Saturday morning I was feeling “right as rain”…uh oh, dating myself again with that comment. Hey! Can I help it that I as the Quote Queen? Quotes are kinda my thing! Anyway, feeling right as rain, mom and I went out shopping Saturday morning but dark clouds soon gathered as mom got sick. I believe she has allergies, she swears it’s the flu, but regardless, she was miserable! So we cut our day short and headed home. I then made plans to drop mom off at the house and run to the store to gather supplies to make Ceviche! I’d been craving it since a friend posted a picture on Facebook.

Got mom inside and settled and decided to make a bathroom stop. I should just have kept on going with a full bladder because when I arose from the throne of the Quote Queen…I felt a twinge again and by the time I walked back to my bedroom I was hunched over in pain! As simple as that people! Sciatica is a Bitch! A conniving, scheming, back-stabbing BITCH! It comes without warning. You can’t protect yourself from it, you can’t take it easy, I mean how much easier can I take it than arising from the throne? I’ve been sitting down and getting back up for years with no problem and then “Boom!” excruciating pain! So here I can’t move and mom is sick too! From one second I went from being a self sufficient, strong, independent woman to being a puddle of pain and agony, unable to even get out of bed!

And it continued, all Saturday afternoon and night. I finally took a Vicodin pill, much as I hate taking any pills, especially pain pills! I felt well enough to make some dinner and shower and then went to bed. Soon however the Vicodin upset my tummy and I spent the rest of the night in major pain from Sciatica, nothing was comfortable, not standing, not sitting, not laying down and on top of that the pain and the pills made me keep throwing up and I couldn’t even manage the walk to the bathroom! Thank goodness for the trashcan in my room! I’ll spare you any further details on that except to say that I spent the worse night of my life that night and I just wanted to die already! Seriously! I spent that whole night in a cold sweat, vomiting and crying and writhing in pain!

A while back, I was in a Sciatica group on Facebook that scared the heck out of me. The people in the group would post about how the pain was so bad that they wanted to die and some would post about how they had to crawl on the floor to get to the bathroom and I thought, “That will never be me!” And it wasn’t me, but only cause I couldn’t even manage crawling to the bathroom! Needless to say I got out of that group right away!

Sciatica is a horrible, horrible illness and I hate it and fear it and I can’t protect myself from it because as I said, it’s an evil, conniving bitch that comes without warning!

Sunday morning I was unable to get out of bed. Luckily I remembered my TENS Unit. Tens stands for Transcutaneous Electrical Nerve Stimulation. It works by sending stimulating pulses across the surface of the skin and along the strands of the nerves. I applied the electrodes and let it run for 30 minutes and tried getting out of bed and was able too. So I sat in a chair and did another 30 minutes. I continued to use it on and off throughout the day and it definitely helped. The one drawback is that it numbs my leg and gives me what I call “spaghetti or noodle leg”. That leg becomes very weak and I have to be careful putting weight on it as it will give way and I will fall! But I was able to make it to work today and we’ll see how the day progresses!

So to make a long story just a bit longer, I feel old today. I feel like my body is giving up on me. But not my mind! My mind is still 22 years of age, even though it knows all these old quotes, my mind is young and strong and refuses to allow my body to be old. I will survive, like the song says! Oh my gosh, there I go quoting a song from 1978! But…I will get better and get healthy and keep exercising and losing weight! Sciatica…you will not beat me! You will not Win!




 

Conquering my Fears

This Saturday I conquered a fear that I have had for several years. It's a weird one, so brace yourself...my fear of escalators!

You didn't know about my fear of escalators? Well it exists and actually it's more a fear of the down escalator...I can handle the up one. I even invented a whole beautiful story about Princess Sciatica and her Castle of Escalators, you can read that HERE, pretty cute story even if I do say so myself!

See, I am Princess Sciatica and several years ago I got Sciatica pretty bad! I have to say that it's the worse pain I have ever been in. Sciatica is a pain that affects the back, hip and outer side of the leg and is caused by a compression of a spinal nerve root in the lower back. Sciatica causes the affected leg (in me it's my left leg) to feel numb and weak. It was this weakness in my left leg that scared me when it came to taking the down escalator. I just felt that it would give way and I would tumble down the escalator to my death!

Well this Saturday I returned to the scene of the crime...the Macy's Story in the Mall. Once again we had to travel beyond the first floor. Using the up escalator was no problem and I knew that there was an elevator and a service elevator so I wouldn't be trapped. We shopped and tried on dresses and then it was time to head down and we started towards the elevators, passing right by the down escalator.

I don't know what hit me, but all of a sudden I knew that I could do it! I knew that I could kick the down escalators butt! So I told Lisa I would meet her and mom down stairs and then I just did it! Lisa stood there staring at me in amazement and I turned around and stuck my tongue out at her...like a BOSS! I was so proud of myself!

I know that the reason I was able to do it is that I have been exercising and I can feel that I've strengthened my left leg (my right too but that one wasn't the problem). I've strengthened my core and my sense of balance as well and that all made it possible for me to go down the down escalator!

Today I was emailing back and forth with my sister when she mentioned how I had conquered my fear of the down escalator and it made me think of other fears I have. I don't like to have fears. I could only thing of three things:

1. The Down Escalator ...Conquered!

2. Eating Alone in a Restaurant

3. Driving on the Coronado Bridge in San Diego

I've always hated to eat alone, but I think with the love that we Americans have with our cell phones that no one would even notice if I were alone in a restaurant. In fact most of them would probably be alone themselves and on their phones! So that's an easy one conquer...but the Coronado Bridge?

Have you seen the Coronado Bridge?

Yeah, that is something that just scares me to death. I just know that the second I drive on to that bridge I am going to get vertigo and drive right off to my death! Just like I knew that Sciatica was going to make me fall all the way down the down escalator to my death!

But no matter how strong my core gets, or my legs or whatever...I know that I can't drive on that bridge and it kills me because like I said before, I hate to fear anything! I don't want to be a sissy-la-la that can't even drive on a little old bridge.

But maybe I'll try eating alone before I tackle the Coronado Bridge...don't you think?

What fears do you have? What fears have you overcome? What fears do you know are your "Coronado Bridge"?
        

I'm not Super Woman After All

I almost died last night! 

Ok, so I didn’t almost die, but I could have. The day started out like any other day. I got up, took the dogs out to say hello to the day and to pee of course. Came back in and dressed and did my Leslie Sansone walking video. I texted my sister that it was time for coffee and headed to the kitchen to make coffee. 

Lisa got there and we had coffee with mom. We showed Lisa all the treasures we had found the day before at the Goodwill and gave her a few surprises we had bought for her. Toward the end of the coffee klatch I started feeling a little bit dizzy. The room would spin and when I looked at my mom or Lisa they would kind of float left to right or right to left. I thought it was odd but put it to the side because I had a lot of stuff on my “to do” list. 

Lisa left and I put in a load of laundry and went outside and got the little step ladder because one of my “to do’s” for the day was to scrub the walls in the bathrooms. You know how they get icky after shower upon shower and then when the new cooler was installed a few weeks ago a lot of lint and other yuck got stuck and it was looking horrendous and I just can’t handle that. 

So I got up on the ladder with a warm bucket of soapy water and a dizzy head and fell to scrubbing and scrubbing. I was concerned about the dizziness but as women are wont to do I soldiered on because I’m an idiot! 

I finally got one bathroom done and then realized it was ridiculous to continue using a ladder due to the dizziness, so I put it away and told my mom I was done because I felt a little dizzy. She had made some breakfast burritos so I had one thinking maybe I was just hungry. Just so you know, I un-wrapped it and just ate the stuffing; the tortilla is not worth the carbs! 

As I sat there eating my burrito my right arm started hurting, aching. I thought that was weird because I had mainly used my left arm to scrub the walls but took an Aleve and tossed in another load of laundry. My arm started hurting more and more. So badly that I could find no position to place my arm in that did not give me unbearable pain and I started to get nauseous and had to throw up. 

So I did what I do anytime something is difficult in my life, I took a nap. It was hard finding a good position, but eventually I realized if I laid on my right side with my arm straight out and my head on my arm I was comfortable enough to sleep, so I did, for about an hour. 

When I awoke I immediately tried to get up and couldn’t! We have a bug in Arizona that we called a “pinacate”, also called a Desert Stink bug. When you turn this little bug on its back it struggles with its legs and arms flailing to turn itself over….and that is exactly how I felt, flailing with no results. I had to text my son to come and help me up. 

Up to now I had not told anyone how bad the pain was so he was shocked that I was holding my right arm to my chest and in tears. Then my sister called and I told her about the dizziness and the shakiness and the nausea and the pain in my arm and she immediately said it sounded like a heart attack. My sister…she always turns to the worst case scenario. I told her no, because it was my right arm, if it was a heart attack my left arm would hurt. 

We hung up and she called back immediately as she had consulted with Dr. Google and Dr. Google said heart attacks in women have different symptoms than heart attacks in men and she read me the symptoms which sounded exactly what my symptoms were. I told her we better head to the ER room.

Since I had planned to spend the day cleaning and doing laundry I had not bothered with make up or doing my hair and though I tried to “pretty up” it was a struggle just to brush my teeth. Mom had to make a ponytail for me. My mom had not made me a pony tail since I was a child. Needless to say she was out of practice! I cried while I changed into a clean shirt and shorts and just put on a ball cap! 

We headed to the ER. The great thing about thinking you are having a heart attack is that you become a priority in the ER. You don’t have to sit there with other sick people for hours. The bad thing is they quickly did an EKG and said it was not a heart attack, my blood pressure was great, and so they sat me on a bed in the ER room until they had a chance to take some x-rays to find out why my arm and shoulder hurt so badly. 

Another bad thing is x-rays, especially when you are in excruciating pain and you have to maneuver your arm in different angles to get a good view, but I’m a soldier and did what I had to do…and then we waited and waited and waited. The x-rays were taken at 5:27 pm and we didn’t get to speak with the doctor until 9:24 pm! 

While the results were not as horrible as a heart attack, it was still not great news to hear that I have Bursitis. Bursitis in my right shoulder and Sciatica in my left leg! I think it’s time to put this old horse down, I’m just a mess! 

They gave me a shot of Tramadol for the pain and some Prednisone tablets for the inflammation, and a prescription for some more meds. If you know me you know that I HATE to take meds. I have to be dying before I even will take Aleve, now I have more meds I will have to take daily. 

It sucks! It makes me realize I am getting old. I can remember my mom and dad sitting at the kitchen table on Sunday night sorting out their pills for the week in a little plastic box like this one. 

It’s just sad to realize I am at that point. It’s also sad to realize that I can’t just scrub walls like I did in my 20’s and 30’s, I have to slow down and some of the chores that need to be done will have to wait or just not get done at all. I’ve always hated to depend on anyone and preferred to do it “my way” before and now I will have to rely on someone else to help and to be happy with the way they do it. 

I know, look on the bright side and be happy it wasn’t something more serious like a heart attack, be happy that you didn’t fall off the ladder which you insisted getting on like a moron when you were dizzy, but it’s hard to realize that you’re human and that you’re body is going to start rebelling. In my mind I feel like I’m 22 but my body sure doesn’t feel that way!

 

Random Reflection - The News 24/7

Finally starting to feel a little bit better after suffering from Sciatica for the past two or three weeks. The massaging treatments have really been helping and I'm glad to say that the $37.00 I spent on the book was worth every penny! Now that I'm getting better I need to start taking better care of myself, exercising more, doing my stretching exercises and trying not to stress too much...which is what this post is about.

Today my co-worker came into my office to tell me that she had just read about another shooting at a school in Atlanta. I knew about it already because as I was scanning my facebook wall during a trip to the bathroom...yes, I take my cell phone to the bathroom, I will defend that later; anyway...I was scanning my facebook wall and I saw a post from one of the local news anchor that I follow that read, "Report: 2 people shot at Price Middle School in Atlanta. 2 suspects in custody. here we go again."

Just a few posts later there was another post from another anchor that I follow from the same local news station that read, "Breaking news: ATLANTA (AP) - Atlanta fire official: 14-year-old shot in head at middle school, hospitalized."

Each post had several comments such as"Oh my God what is the world coming to", "this is why we need gun control", "this is why I will not send my kids to school but will home-school them" and "where are these kids parents? Why don't they know what their children are up to?"

Frankly...I myself am sick and tired of all the media coverage of events like this. Back in the day (before cell phones and Internet and 24/7 coverage of every single little aspect of life), we didn't hear all day about anything that was going on in the world unless we maybe turned the radio on in our car during our lunch break. We wouldn't hear anything until we got home and turned on our televisions and listened to the evening news.

By the time that we got to our homes and turned on the evening news, the media for the most part had all or most of the facts and they were able to tell us what had happened. Briefly we would be riveted to the television, waiting to hear the details. Then the details would be given to us and we would know whether the person involved was hurt or had died and who had committed the crime and whether or not they had been apprehended. We had the facts.

So what right? Now we have news instantaneously. No...we don't have news, we have rumors and sound-bites and they are interviewing anyone and everyone, even people that don't know anything about what is happening but want their 15 minutes of fame!

For example, the shooting of the children at Sandy Hook Elementary School. I was at work when I heard about it and my co-worker and I were riveted to every piece of breaking news showing up on yahoo and MSN and Google. First we hear the name of the shooter was Ryan Lanza, we later find out that it was his younger brother Adam. We hear that Ryan shot his mother Nancy, who was a teacher at the school...come to find out Adam shot his mother Nancy and she was not a teacher at the school.

My point today is not to point out all the inconsistencies in what was reported that day but mainly to point out that myself, along with millions of others that day were riveted to the news, on our phone, laptops, Ipads, computers...all of us with tears in our eyes and our hearts in our throats stressing out and suffering all day long with every little detail that surfaced.

Since that day I have resolved to not read news items during the day. To spare myself that pain and agony and stress. Does that mean I don't care about what happened at Sandy Hook, or today in Atlanta? No...I care, I care very much and my heart hurts for all the victims and for their families and friends; but I won't spend every minute of my day poisoning my mind and tormenting my heart with all the "news" the media is putting out there just for ratings or shock-value. I'll wait until I get home and watch the news, or read the newspaper the next morning and spare myself the constant torture AND STRESS of a too quick to report world.

What I love about blogging though is that I can put my thoughts and ideas out there and YOUcan tell me in the comments what you think? Why you think that having instantaneous news, correct or not is important to you...or why you feel like me. I'm interested in knowing your thoughts on this matter. What say you?

Sciatica Update and a Recipe and a Mosaic!

Photo Credit - Carmen Beecher

When last we got together I was one big throbbing ball of pain due to Sciatica! That was Wednesday and today is Saturday. Thursday and Friday actually got worse, the pain radiating and moving at times to my knees, then to the shin area of my leg, then to the top of my foot. I had a very difficult time sleeping and had to take a Vicodin...and I hate taking any kind of medicine, especially those that alter your mood and character!

Thursday night I went on an Internet hunt to try to find something, some exercise or food or medicine...that would give me some relief! I found this website, treatsciaticanow.com and reviewed it, searched online for reviews from others that have tried it. I contemplated it because you have to purchase an online e-book for $37.00! Anyone that knows me knows that I don't pay more than 80cents for a book because I buy them all at the Goodwill Store! But I was desperate and my pain-filled brain said, "Do IT!" So I ordered it and quickly reviewed it and went to bed, exhausted from the pain.
Sciatica Treatment

Friday I told my sister about it and sent her an email with the part of the book that tells you what you need to do in order to start relieving the pain in as little as 7 days if not sooner. She said she would come over that evening and help me as it requires some massaging in an area I can't reach. Friday evening I told her it would be better to wait until Saturday morning as I didn't know if having her massage me on Friday night might make the pain worse and I would be unable to sleep.

This morning she came over and we opened up the ebook and looked at the drawings and read the directions and she went to work. The book says you need to do the process for 8 minutes, it was tiring work and hard and painful on me so we did it for a little bit less. (It was also tiring for my sister, just try massaging someone for 8 minutes...8 minutes is a long time!) When I got up I told her I felt better, but it was really hard to gauge it as the massage itself causes pain.

She left and I sat for a while with the heating pad on my leg, which I had been doing all week and then I started watching low-carb videos on YouTube and that made me hungry. I debated just eating some cereal because it's very difficult for me to stand and walk with Sciatica, the pain is excruciating (and I have a high tolerance for pain). 

As I went into the kitchen to get the cereal, I noticed that the pain was not quite as bad. I walked around for a bit and thought, "hmmm, maybe I should try making those breakfast muffins I just watched a video on."

Amazingly I was able to stand and walk long enough to put these together.

I kid you not! After just one treatment! I did have to sit down while I chopped the veggies and the ham and usually I stand at the counter to do it, but I did it! I am amazed and SO happy because as I mentioned in the previous post I am supposed to go to Arizona in February for a huge family reunion and I was really looking forward to it but knew that with the Sciatica this bad I would not be able to attend!

My sister will be coming back tonight to do another massaging treatment and hopefully within 7 days I should be cured from Sciatica forever! (At least that is what they say on the website) Sciatica Treatment

So, I am going to continue to take it easy today and do the normal Sciatica stretches and continue to use the heating pad, but I can't wait for my sister to come back tonight to do another treatment! Maybe tomorrow, if I feel well enough I can take my mom to some Goodwill Stores and hit the supermarket to do some grocery shopping as our cupboards are bare.

For those of you that don't have Sciatica, or don't know anyone who has Sciatica and just want the recipe for those yummy breakfast muffins pictured on the mosaic above, here we go...

I got the idea from Pinterest and watched this video



As I mentioned...my cupboards are bare and so is my refrigerator. I didn't have any sausage or bacon, but what I did have was ham and veggies and the eggs of course. So I diced up my red bell peppers and diced up the ham. I sprayed the muffin pan with non stick spray and then filled them with the ham and some with ham and veggies. Because I love me some spiciness...I also chopped up some pickled jalapenos and even added some of my mom's Chile Macho (diced up roasted Ortega peppers with tomato and seasonings).

Then I mixed up 6 eggs, I figured one per muffin, but as you will see in the photos to follow, maybe 5 eggs would have been enough. I poured the egg into each muffin cup. 

That looked great already but then I remembered the cheddar cheese! BAM! as Chef Emeril Lagasse would say! That kicked it up a notch right?

Now it was time to put them into a pre-heated, 350 degree oven and bake for 15 to 20 minutes. DO NOT do what I did and overfill the cups...you can see what happened! See they rise up almost like a souffle but then start shrinking back almost as soon as you take them out of the oven.

Aren't they gorgeous???? Even with the horrible quality of my cell phone camera you can still see how lovely and puffy they are!

In the video you can see that she takes them out of the pan immediately  but mine seemed to be stuck, so I waited a little while but still had to use a butter knife to pry them out. They didn't break apart or anything but they did leave me a messy pan I have to clean up...later.

But regardless of them spilling over and sticking to the pan, they were so pretty! And the best part is you can freeze them or just put them in a plastic container in the fridge and grab one and nuke it and go in the morning, or take them to work with you for a delicious filling snack!

I let my mom be the guinea pig and she tried one and proclaimed it to be very good (she ate the whole thing so she was either starving or it really was good.) Now it's my turn, here's my breakfast muffin!

Mmmm, it is very good! It's got a great texture, you can pick it up with your hands and eat it like a cupcake, or you can be refined like me and use a fork! Either way it was yummy. I was going to eat a slice of avocado with it, but it was so good alone I didn't even think about the avocado. 

I found this great tool online where you can type in your ingredients and it will give you nutrition info, including how many carbs per serving. You can find this at Calorie Count. As you can see from the info below, these muffins have 1.5 grams of carbs and only 0.9 grams of sugars. You could probably add flax seed to add some fiber to it. But that's awesome! This site is great because it gives you grades for each ingredient and then gives you pros and cons of the recipe  As you can see it is high in cholesterol and sodium, so you might want to use Egg Beaters which would help.

So anyway...I hope my healing progresses and I'll keep you all updated. For now I'm going to go take a little walk and maybe clean that muffin pan and then I'm going to watch a movie and perhaps nap a little. I am recuperating you know.

Hey! Thanks to all of you that have emailed me suggestions and ideas on how to help my Sciatica pain or just emailed me to send me get well wishes...it is so appreciated!



Joining the gang at Little Red House for Mosaic Monday. It's been a long time since I've played along with them and it feels good to be getting back into the swing of blogging!




 

Sciatica Pain has got me down again!

     I am suffering from an ailment more painful than childbirth! I kid you not! I've given birth naturally and by C-section and I would rather give birth to 100 babies in a row than to suffer Sciatica for even one day!

     Back in April of 2010, Sciatica hit me for the first time. It was so bad that I was off of work for almost a month, had to go to Urgent Care about three times, Emergency room once and had to go to physical therapy. I had almost decided back then that I would have to go on disability as I could work. I couldn't sit, stand, lay down or do anything without excruciating pain.

     Because of Sciatica, I can no longer wear beautiful shoes. No more sexy heels, just flat, ugly manly looking shoes. Because of Sciatica I have a deathly fear of Escalators!

     Well it's baccckkkkk! I've felt it coming on slowly for about two weeks now. For those of you that don't know what Sciatica is...

Sciatica (pron.: /saɪˈætɪkə/; sciatic neuritis)^[1] is a set of symptoms including pain that may be caused by general compression or irritation of one of five spinal nerve roots that give rise to each sciatic nerve, or by compression or irritation of the left or right or both sciatic nerves. The pain is felt in the lower back, buttock, or various parts of the leg and foot. In addition to pain, which is sometimes severe, there may be numbness, muscular weakness, pins and needles or tingling and difficulty in moving or controlling the leg. Typically, the symptoms are only felt on one side of the body. Pain can be severe in prolonged exposure to cold weather.
Although sciatica is a relatively common form of low back pain and leg pain, the true meaning of the term is often misunderstood. Sciatica is a set of symptoms rather than a diagnosis for what is irritating the root of the nerve, causing the pain. This point is important, because treatment for sciatica or sciatic symptoms often differs, depending upon the underlying cause of the symptoms and pain levels. Sciatica is also referred to as Lumbar Radiculopathy,^[2] which involves compression of the sciatic nerve roots caused by a herniated (torn) or protruding disc in the lower back.

     On Monday I was able to hang in there at work until 2pm, then Tuesday I toughed it out until 3pm. Today I got up and was determined to go to work but after a restless night of hardly any sleep as I could not find a position that was comfortable and pain free, I decided "the heck with it, I'm staying home!"

     I've been doing all the recommended exercises and stretches. I have a TENS unit that I apply three times a day but nothing is really helping at this point. I know that it just has to run it's course and go away by itself.

     I hope it's soon though as I have a huge family reunion to attend in Arizona in February and there will be games and dancing and other activities and I sure don't want to be sidelined, if I am even able to attend as it will be a 6 hour drive!

     So for now I'm going to go take a little walk as movement is better than bed-rest when you have Sciatica, and I hope to be able to go back to work tomorrow. Wish me luck!

 

Sciatica and the Escalator

Once upon a time there was a beautiful Princess named Sciatica and she lived in a huge castle. The castle was so grand that the king had escalators installed to passenger the queen, the princess and honored guests up and down the various floors of the castle.

Princess Sciatica loved going up the escalators but she had an intense fear of the escalators leading down. She would see  the others getting on the down escalator with no problem, laughing and joking and hanging on to the moving hand rail, but when it was Princess Sciatica's turn to go down, she would stand at the edge and tell herself she could do it, but she would immediately feel a weakness in her legs and a sense of vertigo and she knew that if she tried to take one step on those moving stairs, her legs would not have the strength to hold her and she would fall and tumble all the way down to her death!

Luckily the King had also installed elevators in the castle and Princess Sciatica would ride the lonely elevator down to the lower floors. She could hear the laughter and joy of the others racing up and down on the escalators and she so longed to join them and swore to herself that one day she would!

One day, the Princess rode the escalator to the third floor which is where her bedroom was. She needed to fetch her fencing gloves and then she quickly raced to the other end of the castle to where the King, good King Otis had installed the elevators. She pushed the down button and waited. After a few minutes, she pushed the button again and waited. Then she did what any intelligent person knows to do, push the button over and over again! That always makes the elevator come faster cause it knows your are pretty darned ticked off by now!

Yet the elevator didn't come and the Princess did not know what to do. She roamed the third floor where she found her sister Princess Lisa and her mother, the good Queen Tomasa. She was crying and telling them that she wanted to go back downstairs but the elevator would not come. The sister and the queen knew of Princess Sciatica's intense fear of the down going escalator, but they tried to convince her how easy it was and that they would go before her so she wouldn't have to fear falling. They would catch her! But fear struck the poor Princess's heart and no amount of cajoling or pleading would help. Was our poor Princess destined to live forever in the highest floor of the castle?

Apparently...yes! I know this cause it happened to me yesterday. I am Princess Sciatica!

Yesterday I went to Macy's Department Store with my mom and my sister. My mom had a gift card and wanted to use it to purchase a set of sheets for her new bed. The bedding department is on the third floor of Macys. My mom, sister and I rode the escalator up to the second floor, then the third. I had no fear going up and no worries about how I would get back down as I knew they had an elevator. Easy Peasy!

We shopped for sheets and then searched for the elevator and headed over and did as Princess Sciatica did. I hit the button and waited....then I hit the button again and waited...then my sister Princess Lisa hit the button (in case the elevator just didn't like me) and again we waited. Then I tried the old faithful move and hit the button several times in succession...nothing! Fear struck my heart! What was I to do?

My mom and Lisa tried to convince me that it's easy to get on the escaltor going down. They would help me, they would go down before me and that way if I fell I would fall on them. Aren't they wonderful to sacrifice themselves like that for me? Especially my 78 year old mother! But I knew that I couldn't do it. I no longer had the leg strength. Not since the great Sciatica Debacle of 2010!

For some reason, ever since I had that awful bout of Sciatica in 2010; where I had to take almost a month off of work because I was in the most excruciating pain I have ever had (it was worse than childbirth. I had two kids, one natural and one c-section...trust me, it was worse than childbirth), I don't have the strength in my left leg that I used to. It's hard just to climb stairs using my left leg. So I have to climb them by putting the right leg on the step first and then bringing the left leg up, then the right again, then the left. It's quite embarassing!

So there we were on the third floor. I can't use the down escalator and my mom and sister can't just leave me cause I drove and I had the car keys! We asked a couple of the sales clerks if the elevator was working or not and they really didn't know. Then I saw an official looking lady in a navy pin-striped suit and I asked her. And bless her little pea-picking heart, she saved Princess Sciatica! She told us that they were doing some work on the elevator so they were not working, but that she could take us down using the service elevator. I think she saw my elderly mom and thought she would do a nice thing for the sweet, elderly, gray-hair woman.

So she takes us through some double doors by the elevator and we're in the back of the store. And she was so sweet and she pretended like she was giving us a tour and pointing out products and joking with us. She was wonderful. Then she pushed the service elevator button and the doors opened. She then opened up this cage thing and she stepped in and said, "C'mon in!"

 We were all a little apprehensive. It looked scary. My mom even asked her in a timid little voice, "You are going with us right?" Our little Guide assured us that she would never leave us alone, "Oh nowhoney...I wouldn't leave you alone, Oh Heavens No!" So we had no choice, we walked on in. Our little tour guide then proceded to close the elevator doors and then manually pull down the gate door. Now we were in the Belly of the Beast! The elevator started. It was slower than the public elevator so it took a little while for the elevator to get to the bottom. Our little guide just kept chattering to us about various "behind the scene" things at Macys. We were almost to the main floor when my mom felt she had to make one thing clear. She turned to our little guide and she said, "The reason we needed the elevator is because my daughter is scared to go down the escalator." And then she pointed at me!

Can you believe that? My own mother threw me under the bus like that....lol. You have to admire her though, she didn't want to be thought of as some poor elderly lady that needed help getting around. Oh no! Not her, she's very proud of still being strong and independent! But dang-it...was my face red! Poor Princess Sciatica...

I won't wear ugly shoes!

For those who haven't been reading the few posts I've written for the past couple of months, I'll bring you up to date.

I'm an old crippled woman! Seven weeks ago I was an active, healthy, spry, energetic, vital woman...and now I'm an old crippled woman!

Why? How? You ask. Well ...simply put, Sciatica. Sciatica kicked my butt and made me an old crippled woman! Now instead of being active, healthy and spry; I'm limping and making groaning noises when I get out of a chair. Instead of being energetic and vital I get exhausted simply by taking a shower or making my bed!
Ahhh, the good old days are behind me now, at least until this pain goes away and I am back to normal.

One of the downfalls to having sciatica is that I can no longer wear my pretty shoes. Now I'll admit it, I'm vain. I like to look good. I enjoy wearing pretty things. I won't leave the house without full makeup and my hair being done. But Sciatica has taken that all away from me, like a thief in the night, like the income tax man on April 15th, like...well you get the picture.

Because of the weakness in my left leg I have to be very careful when I walk, especially if I'm going up stairs because that leg will suddenly just give out and I crumble like a wet noodle! Awww but Vanity, thy name is woman.

For the past three weeks I have been forced to go to work in one of two pairs of pants I own that are short enough that I can wear my Skechers Sneakers. The ones that resemble these.

I have to wear the lowest heel possible so that I don't die from the pain of walking and also so that I don't fall down. Saturday I decided that I would try to find some dressier black shoes with no heels. Something that would still make me feel sleek and feminine, ok... maybe not sleek cause that would take more than shoes but you know what I mean. Unfortunately, most of the shoes with flat heels all fell under the category of shoes like these:

Oh Sciatica...you may have made me cry and beg for mercy; you may have made me writhe in pain and go days without a shower. You may have made me leave my house with no makeup and greasy hair on the way to the emergency room and to physical therapy. You may have made me dizzy and groggy with your need for medication...but I tell you this!!! Sciatica...as God is my witness...I will never wear ugly shoes!!!!

Sciatica, Sciatica, Over the hills to Attica?

This has been the first time I have been able to blog since a bout of Sciatica hit me on Sunday afternoon while attempting to spring clean my closet!

For those that aren't aware of what Sciatica is it's is a set of symptoms including pain that may be caused by general compression and/or irritation of one of five spinal nerve roots that give rise to each sciatic nerve, or by compression or irritation of the left or right or both sciatic nerves. The pain is felt in the lower back, buttock, and/or various parts of the leg and foot. In addition to pain, which is sometimes severe, there may be numbness, muscular weakness, pins and needles or tingling and difficulty in moving or controlling the leg. Typically, the symptoms are only felt on one side of the body.

My pain is on the left side of my body from the butt to my knee. So I guess I broke my butt!

I think I've sat long enough because it's starting to hurt again. I'm off to take a happy pill and take a nap. Not voluntarily though, it's the happy pills that knock me out.