Wednesday, January 18, 2017

We Will Not Go Off Alone

Photo Credit -
Today I spoke with a friend whose Grandma had passed away last week. He’s heading out of state tomorrow to the funeral with his wife and children. Grandma had lived with them for the past 7 years. She was a young grandma, only 76 years old, so they weren’t expecting her death.

Grandma had started passing hints to them that her time was coming. They didn’t really notice until she actually died and they compared notes. Grandma had a premonition that her time was close. I find that amazing…but wait…there’s more.

The evening of her passing Grandma asked her granddaughter to fry her some eggs, she was too weak to stand at the stove and fry them herself. Grandma was very self-reliant and never asked for help (she reminds me so much of my mom). The granddaughter thought it was odd and called the grandson to remark to him that Grandma had asked for help and she NEVER does that, but she made her the eggs and didn’t think about it again.

The grandson called Grandma’s son and asked him to just stop by and check on his mother as she wasn’t feeling well. The grandson finished up some work at the office and when he got home Grandma’s son was there so the grandson went to go lay down for a bit as he had a headache.

He got up a bit later and went down to grab a bite to eat and came back to lay down and as he was laying there the dogs started making a racket and barking like crazy. He shot up and ran out of the room and saw his niece and asked her what was going on? Was someone at the door? And the niece said no, it was just the dogs barking at Grandma who had gotten up to go to the bathroom. 

He thought that was weird as they had never barked at Grandma before but he went back to go lay down. Not much time had gone by and the dogs went crazy barking again and again he got up to see what was happening and ran into his son who remarked that the dogs were barking at Grandma who was heading back to her room. They both said that was weird, but things settled down and they both went back to what they were doing.

The niece happened to walk by the bathroom a bit later and saw that Grandma had left the light on and that there was a light under Grandma’s bedroom door so she peeked in thinking Grandma probably fell asleep with the light on as she often did.

Grandma was sitting in her chair, with her eyes open and was unresponsive. The niece screamed that something was wrong with Grandma and they all ran upstairs. The grandson and his son picked Grandma up out of the chair and laid her on the floor so that the granddaughter could begin CPR. They called 911.

Police arrived first, and then the EMT’s and they also began life saving measures on Grandma. Eventually they EMT’s told the family that they were sorry, but there was nothing else they could do. Grandma was gone.

The grandson remarked that it was weird that they had not noticed how much weight Grandma had lost. When he and his son picked her up to lay her on the floor they almost dropped her as they expected so much more weight than what she really was. How did they not notice? That troubled him.

He remarked that he was also troubled about her dying in the house, in that room. I told him, “You know what I think? I am comforted by two things, one that she died at home and not in a hospital or on her way in an ambulance. She had a delicious meal cooked by her precious granddaughter, she saw her son and she knew all the people she loved best were at home and safe. 

Secondly, the fact that the dogs were barking leads me to believe that they weren’t barking at Grandma, they knew her, they never barked at her; they were barking at someone that came to take Grandma and show her the way.”
He was quiet for a moment and then he said “That kind of bothers me to know there was an entity in the house.” I told him that to me it was a comfort, because it means someone gets sent to show us the way. The dogs saw this person and that’s why they were barking because they didn’t know the person, but animals see things sometimes that we don’t. Grandma was not scared, she may or may not have known this person was there, but she wasn’t scared. 

He again sat there quietly and said, “It was her momma, her momma came to get her, and you know what Alicia? I didn’t tell you this but last night Grandma’s brother died. Grandma and her momma went to go get him.”

Before he left he told me that he found great comfort in knowing that Grandma didn’t go off alone to some new place, someone that loved her was sent to guide her to the right place and when it’s our time, someone will come to guide us…maybe Grandma will come for him. He left comforted and I feel comforted too because I know that when it was my dad’s time someone, probably his beloved sister Olivia came for him and someday someone will come for me as well. We will not go off alone.


  1. Many find comfort in the belief that the deceased is going to be greeted and guided by one or more members of the family that is already up there. I favor any belief that helps people cope with the grief of loosing their beloved.

    About two years ago, a cousin of mine died at the age of 68. At the funeral, I delivered a short speech in which I specifically mentioned her late parents and brother who will meet her and embrace her up there, so she won't be alone.(usually, it is believed that an angel is sent to bring the deceased to his final place in heaven).
    The picture is very eloquent on the subject of your post.

    1. I worked for several years in a funeral home and people always did find comfort in believing that we don't go off alone. We spend so much time with our loved ones and we don't like the idea that now they are alone, it's better and easier for us to believe that they are gathered up in the arms of loved ones gone before. Having worked in the funeral industry I too am very much in favor of whatever helps people cope.

      As to the picture, this is the oddest thing. I searched for many images and was amazed to find this one as my friend is Black and the person being led to the beyond by the angel is's like the picture was waiting for me to find it!

  2. My sister has worked as a hospice nurse on and off for the past several decades and she said she often could tell some one had passed before she entered the room. There was a presence about.

    William Adolph Bouguereau did a famous painting on the subject:,%20William-Adolphe.jpg

    I like your choice a better, the parting Soul being aware and moving.

    Interesting post Alicia.

    1. Thank you Sextant. I saw that painting and yes, I agree with you, I like the parting Soul being aware and the feeling that she knows the person who is coming to show her the way. I hope that is the way it is. Although to take a nap while Angels whisk you off is not a bad way to go either!

      Being a Hospice Nurse has to be difficult. I remember the ones that came when my dad was dying and I know I could never do the things they did, kudos to your sister.

  3. What a wonderful story. Thank you for sharing! Yes, I don't think we go alone either. I have heard stories of those who are close to their time even seeing their loved ones.

    1. I've heard that same thing also. One of my cousins says that her mom would speak with someone that was there that they couldn't see. Such an interesting topic, glad you enjoyed the story. :)


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